Spina Bifida Kids

I was having a particularly challenging day yesterday. I fretted most of the day and had some pesty house guesses arrive to just make my pitty party even more exciting. You may know these guys yourself....they are....what if's and coulda, woulda and shoulda! These guys know me all to well and it seems when I am having a difficult "Spina Bifida" kinda day....they pull out all the stops and try to beat me down until all the light that I have been walking in is almost extinguished.

Sometimes I am able to quickly send them on there way and other times I give into their reasoning, which most of the time ends up with me eating a bowl or two or three of ice cream or anything else that I can get my hands on....yesterday...it was Girl Scout Cookies! They showed up at the right moment yesterday...

Last night as I was out on my run for work, the word HOPE kept flooding my mind. I analyzed each letter and found it be a most amazing word. The reality of Spina Bifida is sometimes things are not so wonderful per say. This is what I discovered. I am not sure if I was just overly tired last night or maybe this might make sense to someone else. So....forgive me if I am way out there today.

Here is what I call the dark side of Spina Bifida....
-Heartbreak (when things seem so hard and nothing appears to be going right)
-Ostrich Syndrome (hiding from what you know is happening because you don't think you can handle another diagnosis or appointment or bill or whatever it may be)
-Pacing (because you can't sleep)
-Enough (the point when you really believe that you can't do this!)

Now here is the flip side.....

Happiness......Optimism.....Patience.....Endurance

My point is this.... HOPE is like our personal life-jacket. It keeps you from drowning in the what if's, and coulda, woulda and shoulda's that can weigh so heavily upon us. It is ever present and ready to wrap itself around us. There is safety inside that vest and it takes courage to walk in its light. Maybe instead of eating all that ice cream, I could have found a better way to deal with my moment.Madilyn is still progressing from her spinal surgery. We just passed the 5 week mark and are in full swing with all of her therapies! She is progressing so well and has learned to swim again!

Best Wishes to each of you this week wherever you journey may take you....
Walking in HOPE....
Jill aka...Madilyn's MOM