Monday, February 14, 2011

Shaken but still united.

Those are the words that come to my mind when I think over the last week.

Ive watched us Mommies, Daddies, Aunts and Uncles be slightly shaken.

We've heard all kinds of things recently.
Fetal Surgery, What if, Could Have, Improvement, No shunt, Shunt, Walking, Not walking, percentages, and on and on the list goes.

For those who went through the surgery with their babes. An amazing victory. A punch to the air and a big whoop. maybe some feelings of defensiveness for choosing the surgery.

For those who entered the study but didnt get chosen. Maybe a feeling of defeat. Questions and whys. Maybe some punching of faces instead of air.

For those who were advised against the program completely or chose not to look into it. Confusion, fear and a slew of what Ifs

We could beat ourselves up, We could fight each other, or we could wallow in self-pity and guilt.

But naaaaa. We might be shaken up a bit. We might wonder some. We might have those moments.

But We are still UNITED!

and honestly, no matter what side of the fence you are on. Or maybe you just plain straddle it. Being united is what clearly matters most.
Kari

ps dont forget to send in your pictures for a header for us!!

7 comments:

Sandy said...

It has always been a frustration to me, that we found out about Ireland's sb too late to even try for fetal surgery. Wondering if our doctors should have caught it sooner. But all the time feeling like God was there helping us towards what was best for Ireland. Mixed emotion!

Joanna said...

Oh girl I haven't even gotten there yet. :) Talk about the stomach flue hitting at a bad time! I felt helpless while all my friends worlds were being turned upside down or at least shaken up a bit. But I agree with you - we are still all in this together.

Colleen said...

I've been trying to find some healing words to say during this time too. This is perfect--thanks for this post.

Leigh and Andy said...

Love this post Kari! Our talk yesterday was good for my soul...and so was this! No matter when/how our kids received their closure surgery...they all did. And we are ALL in this thing TOGETHER!! Love ya, girl!! Thanks for this!!

HennHouse said...

I agree with Leigh. Our children are alive because closure surgeries exist. My grandmother lost TWO babies during a time before closure surgery was an option. My mom lost two siblings. I lost two aunts.

We are all in this together... Even though some days are harder than others.

Jill said...

So so so good!

DG said...

Well, if this puts it in perspective, we went to Vanderbilt to check out the study. We were told by the surgeon that their numbers did not indicate initially that the surgery improved the probability of walking and did not decrease the incidence of having to place a shunt. The other thing that the surgery did was cause prematurity... which has it's own host of issues. We opted not to do it and to seek treatment after since it would be fairly risky.